Did you know the principles you live by guide your thoughts and actions? We’re all different as individuals and have unique value systems, which have developed over time. When you have ADHD it’s easy to get distracted and not take the time to think about what’s really important to you. Sometimes as a consequence you can find yourself living out of alignment with who you really are.
Think about the last time you felt uncomfortable or uneasy about a situation. Or, maybe you feel your life is unbalanced and the things you value are getting little to no attention. It’s a pretty easy predicament to get into, especially if you have many responsibilities, like family and work.
Knowing your values helps rein you in a bit and make decisions based on choice. For example, if you value family and spending quality time with your child is important to you but you never do this because you are busy with your job, then you won’t feel very happy or fulfilled until you figure out how to make that happen.
Figuring out what your values are in the first place may not be as easy as it sounds. Sometimes you have conflicting values. Using the example above, it could be the very value that drives you to work long hours is also family. By bringing in a certain amount of money each month you know your family is taken care of, financially.
The next step would be to clarify the balance needed so that both the connection/family and the financial/family aspects are met. Ask yourself, how much less financial/family am I willing to give in order to get more connection/family? Now, sometimes that’s not even an option. What if your employer predetermines your schedule and you cannot change it? That’s when the choices of what to give in order to get connection/family will be about other things not related to family. Again, you will have to decide what’s most important to you.
If you’re spending non-working hours running errands for the family and that’s why you have less connection/family time, then streamlining how those get handled could be an option. If you’re spending your non-working hours doing things for others (due to overcommitting in the moment) then cutting back on that might be your solution.
It all goes back to getting real with yourself about what you value and making the necessary adjustments. You’ll be your happiest when you design your life centered around what you value most.